A fog. A heavy fog that you can feel pressing on you. Have you ever felt that there was something keeping you from being what you know in every cell of your body that you’re destined to do? That bright, piercing desire to go from where you are to where you desperately want to be… and there’s just something in the way. Something big. Something you can’t quite see through or around. But you can nearly feel whatever is waiting for you on the other side.
For years, I’ve had my head down. Pushing to keep my dream, company, vision alive. Some may call what I have internally GRIT. My story has always been one of perseverance. The pages and pages and volumes and epilogues of triumphant struggle… but the struggle is always the star of the show. The weight is always the biggest element in the room. And I hold my tiny, burning light inside, often more comfortable with the STRUGGLE than with the LIGHT.
Maybe it’s to protect it from that pressure outside myself. After all, it is my light. Mine. The one thing no one has ever been able to take from me. I don’t let many see it, perhaps out of fear they’ll think I believe my light is better than theirs. Or that my light has a greater purpose than their light. But when I step back and really look around this universe made of hundreds of thousands of lights, I know that no light is better than another… one might just be closer or more aware to those that need to see it, when they are ready for it.
What I’m saying is… believe it or not, I’m afraid to tell you all of the lessons I have within me. I’m afraid to use my voice to let my light out, because of my fear in dimming someone else’s light.
But the brilliance and burn of the light within me has now became too hot to keep in. And I feel as if the fog is lifting around me, and the very best thing for me to do now is to step into that light, so that I can share more of my light with you. With anyone who needs it. While it’s a scary feeling for me to try to control the release of that light, I know that I’ve held it in for far too long.
So, here I am. In the light. Sharing my light. This is the beginning I’ve been waiting for, and I’m so glad that you’re here to see it.
Ps-- if you’re holding in your light… I’d like to ask you to look inside at it and understand how and why it needs to be released. We’ve spent far too long holding it in… and releasing it, while palm-sweat inducing, may be just what you need, too.