My life has become an episode of Grays Anatomy. Minus having a love affair in an OR with a McSurgeon....but with all the sickness and medical drama that I care to experience. Three weeks ago Benett came down with viral pneumonia. The breathing treatments escalated his terrible behavior into twilight zone status and we barely survived the coughing and throwing up and terrible violence of it all. And then as Benett turned a corner about a week later, I slowly came down with what can only be described as narcolepsy combined with the kind of full body aches that convince you your last day on earth is surely imminent. I drifted in and out of consciousness and took all sorts of voodoo and drugs and oils and piping hot baths....and kept feeling terrible.
Just for fun, Benett developed a secondary bacterial infection that included a double ear infection and upper respiratory junk - that of course - made him throw up violently. We went back into the DR and got him situated on antibiotics, and I went home and crawled back into my hole.
I vaguely recall Easter egg hunts, and making it up to my parents house for the weekend, where I took up residence in a dark and wonderful bedroom equipped with some type of amazing heated mattress pad where I slept for basically 2 days straight. It was all fun and games untilI woke up Sunday morning and my mother informed me that one side of my face had swelled up. WHAT? I looked in a mirror and with horror straight out of my deepest nightmare witnessed one of my cheekbones looking like it had come into contact with some type of cosmetic filler. Fevers? Fine. Aches and pains? Sure. Endless days filled with sleep? Of course. BUT FACIAL SWELLING? oh no no. We were packed up and loaded in the car on our way to urgent care within the hour.
Turns out the virus I was certain I was "almost over" had flourished into a full fledged sinus infection that wasn't draining. It was so bad that my upper teeth hurt when I walked around, and if I bent over to pick up something I felt like my face was going to explode. So, instead of a basket of candy for Easter I got myself a dose of Augmentin strong enough to nuke ebola. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and until my cheeks are roughly the same size again I shall remain in hiding.
The great news to all of this, is that in the midst of Benetts hospital runs his DR determined that it is indeed time to take out his tonsils and adenoids, and put tubes in his ears. So as soon as I am not drowning in sickness we will be heading into surgery for him. I CANT WAIT! Have you ever seen Cujo? The Saint Bernard dog with rabies?
This will be Benett. We are going to have to stand back and throw Popsicles in his general direction and hope for the best. My one wish is for him to just stay in the hospital on an IV so that I dont have to force him to drink fluids. I am certain he will bite me.
In other important news....
My precious Spencer turns 5 this month. A moment of silence, please - for the fact that I have to build lego structures all day every day, and also tolerate long winded stories about Creeper from Minecraft.
I am hopeful that I will actually get some fashion related content conjured up to share this week! Something great involving Neon or my new favorite white pants!
Here's to hoping you are keeping the plague away! I recommend no less than 6 servings a day of your child's Easter candy, and of course a new pair of jeans and as much diet coke as you can get down. #prescriptionforsuccess